I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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