margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
I love having hate sex.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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