I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
