Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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