I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Randomize