Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
