I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
