i don't plan on having that self control this summer
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
