sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
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