Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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