You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Randomize
