I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I think i got beer on your cat.
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