And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
A+ Viking dick
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
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