Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
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