Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
