Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
