We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
