The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
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