it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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