Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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