New invention idea: vibrating tampons
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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