is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize
