Your favorite bartender is back from prision
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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