counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
