I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize