I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
