I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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