We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I think I won the penis lottery.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize