Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
