He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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