He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
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Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
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I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
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