You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
