just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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