Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
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