Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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