Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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