So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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