She said her name was "party"
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize