This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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