her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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