yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Text me some of your sweat
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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