someone threw a dead crab at me
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize