ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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