He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
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