u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
My liver just broke up with me...
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
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