whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Randomize
