So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Randomize
