He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
