I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize
