I have demons in me.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
