wat bout pragnant strippers??
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize