Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Randomize
